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Decathexis

by SMALL

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1.
Coyote 02:31
Sometimes you make me feel so lonely. Is there anything you want to show me? I wish you’d rip me up like a coyote. I wish you’d rip me up like a coyote. Push me, pull me, Saturn rule me. Wash my soul, it got so dirty. Love pollutes the female lover, that’s why they say Earth’s a mother. Even in my dreams, you’re hard to deal with. I don’t even think that you can hear this. I don’t think that you could ever feel this, I don’t think that you could ever feel this. And I get that sinking feeling like I’m stuck behind a screen, staring out at something that I still refuse to see. And I’m sorry that this came up on our way to Tennessee, but I really shouldn’t be here if you won’t stay with me. And you don’t even scream back at me. I miss back when you wished you could have me. I don’t think I even make you happy, I don’t think I even make you happy. Push me, pull me, Saturn rule me. Wash my soul, it got so dirty. Love pollutes the female lover, that’s why they say Earth’s a mother! Sometimes you make me feel so lonely.
2.
Open Casket 02:21
An open casket only seems appropriate ‘cause you looked good in everything. You looked good in everything. You looked good in everything. You looked good in everything. Can you see me undressing in the morning? Do you see me remembering your favorite side? Can you see me undressing in the morning? Do you hear me remembering what you feel like? You looked good in everything. You looked good in everything. You looked good in everything. You looked good in everything. Can you see me dancing with your widow? Do you hear me screaming that I should have called? Do you hear me still on the phone with your big sister? Do you hear your mother say, “This doesn’t look like you at all.”? But! An open casket only seems appropriate ‘cause you looked good in everything. You looked good in everything. You looked good in everything. You looked good in everything. I cut my hand on the broken window. I forgive you, I forgive you. I forgive you, I forgive you.
3.
Fuck Me Up! 02:10
Tie me down and dress me up! I’ll tell you when I’ve had enough! Dress me up and tie me down! Think of me when I’m not around. What do you like to fight about? What did you used to write about? Come in, it’s flesh, not lace. Let’s make this a sacred space. Put me in my place! I’m a doll put me in my case, I’m a doll put me in my case! Kill me! Put me in your grave! What do you like to fight about? What did you used to write about? Tie me down and dress me up! Tie me down and dress me up! Pin me down and fuck me up! Tie me down and dress me up!
4.
Crumbs 01:56
Drugs and blood and crumbs and come, the TV’s on, the TV’s on. I don’t wanna say I’m wrong. Don’t ask me where I’m coming from. Drugs and blood and crumbs and come, the TV’s on, the TV’s on. I don’t wanna say I’m wrong. I shouldn’t have to try at all. Drugs and blood and crumbs and come, the TV’s on, the TV’s on. Something at the restaurant Sunday morning, turn me on! Drugs and blood and crumbs and come, the TV’s on, the TV’s on, the TV’s on, the TV’s on. The TV’s on, the TV’s on. The TV’s on, the TV’s on, the TV’s on, the TV’s on, The TV’s on, the TV’s on, the TV’s on, the TV’s on, The TV’s on, the TV’s on, I swear to God, you’re not the one.
5.
Grahammsong 02:20
Sometimes I wanna tell you that I dreamed about a God that loves you. I think you’re too smart to hear it. This is not a judgment. I like you the way you are, your disbelief, your seeking heart. I like you the way you are. I like you the way you are. I’m sorry this world leaves you scarred, but please don’t ever go. I couldn't live this life alone. I know it’s selfish, but you are the part of me that’s fun. And I’ll be the part of you that loves you. Until you know, I’ll know this for you: You are the moon and stars. I love the white noise in your car. You are the moon and stars. I love the white noise in your heart. You are the moon and stars. I love the white noise in your car. You are the moon and stars, so beautiful the way you are. Sometimes I wanna tell you that I dreamed about a God that loves you.
6.
CC 02:17
I think you look like fun. Would you drive across the country to touch my tongue? I can’t come when I’m nervous or when I’m in love, and I swear to God, I’m never gonna be either one again. I think you look like fun. Would you drive across the country to suck on my thumb? Brought our house candy, how sweet. What a funny way to meet. I’ll clean up when you leave or sleep all week in dirty sheets. I know I look like fun. Would you drive across the country to touch my tongue? I know I look like fun. Would you drive across the country to touch my tongue? Would you drive across the country to suck on my thumb?
7.
Rosemary 03:17
Rosemary under your pillow in bundles couldn’t keep you here when I go under. I thought we took turns believing. I thought it was your turn, now you’re leaving. I was ashamed the whole time. I hope I live. I hope we survive. God, I cried so much, but Jesus Christ. I was always crying. We have such bad memories. We hate our history where I hurt you and you hurt me. Is this the way we’ll always be? That whole month I was sickly and all of your words were so sticky. And for such a bitch, I guess I’m being way too picky. Rosemary under your pillow in bundles couldn’t keep you here when I go under. I thought we took turns believing. I thought it was your turn, now you’re leaving. I was ashamed the whole time. I hope I live. I need you to survive. God, I cried so much, but fuck you. I was always crying. God, I cried so much, but fuck you. I was always crying. I’m just happy to miss you. And I was so lucky to ever be with you. I guess that how much it hurts is the way that I’ll measure how much it was worth.
8.
Better 02:28
I need to be more careful before I get in trouble. I need to be more gentle before I drag you under. I need to watch my words cause I sound just like my mother. I tried to change before, I guess I’ll lose another lover! I still dream that we’re working on an ending. Don’t I seem like I’m almost getting better? I never washed these hands. They’re still dirty from December. I can’t forget your bed. There’s some things you want to remember. I’m sinking in your couch. I’m scared I’m getting ugly. I used to laugh about it. Now I don’t think it’s funny. I’m driving by your house to see if you’re still eating honey. Something’s not quite right so I guess I’ll spend more money. I still dream that we’re working on an ending. Don’t I seem like I’m almost getting better? I never washed these hands. They’re still bloody from December. I can’t forget your bed. There’s some things you want to remember. Sorry I gave you no warning. I’ll be stronger in the morning.

credits

released October 30, 2022

guitar, vox, lyrics: Samm Severin
bass, cover design: Olive Lynch
drums: Jake Cook
lead guitar: Stephen Wilkins
Recorded at Mirror Mirror Recording by Graham Tavel
Mastered by Jesse Mangum at The Glow
photo: Lola Scott

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SMALL Atlanta, Georgia

SMALL is
Samm Severin
Olive Lynch
Trevor Flanders

PERVY PUNK FOR SAD FUCKS

ATL, GA

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